Warning! “Biblical” parenting harms children & parents.

Developmental authoritarianism fosters chimpanzee, not human, nature.

Most conversations about authoritarianism focus on political authoritarianism, which is becoming more familiar in societies today. But there are many kinds of authoritarianism.

As you know, authoritarianism is about control by sanctioned authorities who maintain hierarchy through demand and coercion of obedience through imposed violence and ongoing threats of punishment. Forms of authoritarianism actually characterizes all hierarchical civilizations one way or another because the regime determines what is real/acceptable and suppresses freedom/perception/knowledge of one kind or another. Egalitarian Native Peoples of the world noticed the narrow perceptions of most explorers/settlers/colonizers (from hierarchical societies) who imposed their way on the places they visited instead of noticing, appreciating and fitting into the unique cultural and biological diversity.

The authoritarianism that undergirds all kinds is developmental authoritarianism. It is so pervasive, many do not perceive it until they visit communities where it is absent (e.g., Maslow noted among the BlackFoot Nation that children were not coerced and could choose whom to live with; he also noted the lack of neuroticism/mental illness among the tribe [Brown, 2014], though he failed to notice that evolved nestedness was a contributing factor).

What is developmental authoritarianism? To put it simply, developmental authoritarianism involves controlling the baby/child’s birthing, experiences, and/or growth (trying to make things go according to an authority’s preferences). This contrasts with species-normal experiences of providing developmentally appropriate nested support for the child’s agency, for example, in deciding their birthday and for their ongoing unique unfolding (which is not predictable and may challenge adults).

The most infamous example of authoritarian child raising is Dr. Moritz Schreber who invented all sorts of mechanisms to engineer a child’s developing body—e.g., that kept a child’s body straight when sleeping, that forced the jaw to move ‘properly’ when eating, and to prevent masturbation at night. His children grew up to go mad or commit suicide.

Extreme in a different way, religious developmental authoritarianism also aims to engineer children. “Biblical parenting” is more about controlling the children’s psyche-spirit than keeping bones straight. It aims to make children fearfully dependent on external guidance (parents, pastors, “the Bible”), undermining their self-confidence—i.e., breaking their spirits—and forcing them to find a sense of security only in the religious structures of their upbringing.

The goal is to be Bible centered, rather than child centered, with the Biblical selections and interpretations provided primarily by male patriarchal authoritarians.

“Biblical parenting” became especially popular in the bubble of right-wing Christianity, promoted by its cultural ecosystem of bookstores, authors, initiatives and pastors (Burt & McGinnis, 2025).

Biblical parenting books say things like:

“God pre-programmed all factors for success into His divine plan. As with all matters discussed in Scripture, if you violate the principles, you forfeit the blessings. When you embrace His commandments, the blessings of joy and fulfillment will be yours. (Burt & McGinnis, p. 5, citing Growing Kids God’s Way).

Many Christian parenting books claim to purvey Truth— expecting timeless staying power from conveying ‘what the Bible says.’

Although there are dozens of “Biblical parenting” advisers that one can find in fundamentalist Christian bookstores and online, one of the most well-known became James Dobson, who created an empire warning that parents needed to be accountable to God to discipline (i.e., corporally punish) their children or civilization would collapse, and if that happened it would be the fault of disobedient parents.

Dobson warned about the anti-authoritarianism of the young. Children “are naturally inclined toward rebellion, selfishness, dishonesty, aggression, exploitation, and greed. They don’t have to be taught these behaviors. They are natural expressions of their humanness” (2004, p. 46).

“At the foundation of Dobson’s successful empire is this imperative: Parents must exercise and protect their authority, and children must obey. Without both parents and children playing their rightful part, society would crumble” (Burt & McGinnis, p. 21)

You’d better be the right kind of person, the right kind of parent. And you better be vigilant against those on the outside, those who live without the divine guidance we are giving you, those who tempt you away from duty of authoritarian parenting.

In a cultish way, parents in fundamentalist congregations are monitored and monitor one another for how well they are dominating their children. Fear is pervasive among adults as well as children that hell awaits if the authority’s directives are not followed. In this right-wing Christian bubble, parents actually become middle managers between the commands of religious authorities and raising “clean, chaste, and moral” children (Heimlich, 2011).

There is a common explanation for any problem—you were not following God’s orders. You were not obeying what the Bible/pastor/adviser said. But much like the indulgences demanded by a corrupt Roman Catholic Church a thousand years ago, you can save yourself with money: Give a donation to the leader to earn forgiveness.

Or, severely punish your children so we know you are serious about being saved.

Forcing parents to punish their children causes moral injury to both parent and child. The relationship of trust and nurture is unraveled.

What makes parents succumb to the demands of their leaders to treat their children harshly, against their compassionate nurturing instincts? Not only are there strict power relations, with women and children at the bottom, there is the terror of damnation forever for disobedience. Further, because the fundamentalists and cults live separately from general society to one degree or another, there is limited awareness of the unusual abusiveness that pervades the culture.

Robert “Bob” Altemeyer, foremost researcher on right-wing authoritarianism (RWA; 1996), found that authoritarianism is something that the leaders and followers ‘cook up’ together. Right-wing authoritarians are conventional, submissive and aggressive. Psychoanalytic theorist Erich Fromm (1941) called these three characteristics indicators of ‘escape from freedom.’

Neurobiologically, these characteristics suggests underdeveloped right brains and enhanced survival systems (from missing evolved nestedness), leading to personality orientations that look more like stereotypic chimpanzees—domineering or submissive, unable to flexibly attune to others in an egalitarian manner, which is part of our human distinctiveness that must be cultivated after birth (Narvaez, 2014).

What’s interesting about these “Biblical” parenting manuals is that they do not display an understanding of healthy child development. Yes, infants in the first years of life expect their needs to be met immediately but this is because they resemble fetuses of other animals till nearly age 2. Their brains and self-regulatory systems are growing so fast they need a growth-supporting biochemistry. Distressing them shuts down and impairs growth. Babies know this but these adults do not.

Clearly, they don’t understand how children are formed, treating them as blobs that turn evil if not punished coerced into quick robotic obedience. Such parenting practices of course impairs self-regulation, systems of all kinds, that is co-constructed by experience in the early months and years. Instead, such harsh practices build impaired, fear-directed biology, psychology, and sociality. They cultivate inflammation in the young which is the major cause of all disease. Then they explain the resulting dysregulation and problematic behavior as humanity’s sinful nature or Satan’s influence from lack of parental punishment.

Such “Biblical” advisers say things like: “Every sweet, innocent, cuddly baby possesses within his flesh the constant temptation to fulfill the strong desire of sin. Under the control of sin, the child is totally self-centered; he wants what he wants when he wants it. A child wants to be fed what and when he wishes, to have the total attention of others, to play always, and generally to have his every desire fulfilled without regard for anyone else.” (Fugate, 1996, 63).

Children’s need for affectionate touch is ignored and replaced with punishing touch, twisting expectations for touch into giving and getting violent touch (Prescott, 1996). Hence the violent sadism prevalent in “Biblical” parenting advice and practice.

Burt & McGinnis (2025) and Heimlich (2011) document how “Biblical parenting” has led to widespread child maltreatment of all kinds and even child death.

According to federal guidelines, child maltreatment is defined as “any recent act or failure to act on the part of apparent or caretaker which results in death, serious physical or emotional harm, sexual abuse, or exploitation; or an act or failure to act which presents an imminent risk of serious harm” (Keeping Children and Families Safe Act of 2003).

Heimlich (2011) provides a list of religious child maltreatment:

· Justifying abusive physical punishment with religious texts or doctrine’

· Having children engage in dangerous religious rituals;

· Taking advantage of religious authority to abuse children and procure their silence;

· Failing to provide children needed medica care due to a belief in divine intervention’ terrifying children with religious concepts, such as an angry and punitive god, eternal damnation, or possession by the devil or by demons;

· Making children feel guilty and shameful telling them they are sinful;

· Neglecting children’s safety by allowing them to spend time with religious authorities without scrutinizing the authorities’ backgrounds’ inculcating children with religious ideas; and

· Failing to acknowledge or report child abuse or neglect to protect the image of a religion or a religious group.” (p. 29)

Many parents take one or more of these actions for pious reasons.

But more common is emotional maltreatment: Spurning (rejecting or degrading); terrorizing; isolating; exploiting or corrupting; denying emotional responsiveness; neglecting psychological, medical or educational needs. Religiously flavored emotional maltreatment brings in divine threat and Biblical rationalizations for the mistreatment.

[Think about how common it is for parent advisers, religious or otherwise, to encourage emotional maltreatment of infants: terrorizing, isolating, and denying emotional responsiveness with sleep training and other species-abnormal practices.]

Some “Biblical parenting” advisers encourage a ‘reign of terror’ of frequent, even unpredictable spanking, to teach children who is in charge. Sadism, encouraged here, is a sign of a misdeveloped adult psyche, from that adult’s own childhood. Authoritarians love to make others fearful, with the expectation that followers will fold and obey. Sure, if you are raised to fear punishment and damnation from disobedience, you will expect to hear and follow orders. The Nazis would be proud.

The authoritarian’s need to be right—inerrancy—is a signal of a stiff mind, one governed by a left-brain consciousness, divorced from the flow of life.

“Do not let the crying of the child sway you from administering discipline, because you are sparing him from a greater disaster by administering the rod—it may be that you shall deliver his soul from hell…Do you see how necessary it is to administer discipline? It is literally a question of life and death!” (Burt & McGinnis, p. 127, citing Bruce Ray, Withhold Not Correction)

From a Christian perspective, this breaking of spirit damages the imago Dei, the image of God, with which every child is born. The beauty and insights that each child brings into the world is mangled. Creation is harmed.

I was raised in a fundamentalist Christian religion and I spent a couple of years in fundamentalist colleges. The photographs of me and my friends are revealing. We all look like we are ill, with pale, pinched faces. Our life-energy was shut down to a trickle.

Such damaged people, unhealed, will more easily do damage to others, human and non-human. They will be governed more easily by pre-human, primate survival systems of dominance-submission, limited in their social and emotional flexibility and intelligence. They will be distrustful of Nature, of others, of diversity.

Coercion works with unnested people, not with the nested. The nested are too strong in their security, confidence, trust in intuition and ability to survive. The nested live in joy and presence, rooted in a diverse, living Earth and Cosmos. Creation spirituality, another form of Christianity, honors the inherent goodness in children, better understanding that basic needs must be met for compassionate humanity to come into fullness.

The ”Biblical” authoritarianism of pastors over parents prepares them for political authoritarianism. They’ve given over their sovereignty to a religious adviser who misguides them about “what God wants,” so what’s the difference when a president acts similarly sociopathically? It is easy to be submissive to a mad king who demands obedience and scratches an itch for aggressiveness. And of course, you might be headed to hell if you don’t submit.

References

Altemeyer, B. (1996). The Authoritarian Specter. Harvard University Press.

Brown, S.S. (2014). Transformation beyond greed: Native self-actualization. Book Patch.

Burt, M.F., & McGinnis, K.K. (2025). The myth of good Christian parenting: How false promises betrayed a generation of evangelical families. Brazos Press.

Dobson, J. (2004). The new strong-willed child: Birth through adolescence. Tyndale House.

Fromm, E. (1941). Escape from freedom. New York: Farrar & Rinehart.

Fugate, J.R. (1996). What the Bible says about…child training. Foundation for Biblical Research.

Heimlich, J. (2011). Breaking their will: Shedding light on religious child maltreatment. Prometheus Books.

Miller, A. (1983/1990). For your own good: Hidden cruelty in child-rearing and the roots of violence. New York, NY: Noonday Press.

Narvaez, D. (2014). Neurobiology and the development of human morality: Evolution, culture and wisdom. New York, NY: W.W. Norton.

Prescott J.W. (1996). The origins of human love and violence. Pre- and Perinatal Psychology Journal, 10 (3), 143-188.